Archive for the ‘Film Review’ Category

Bad Blake = Bush?

January 2, 2010

The pro-liberal media that is going into withdrawal pains because they no longer have President George W. Bush to kick around, have gone to warp-speed in their efforts to heap praise on the new movie “Crazy Heart.”  It’s gone beyond the level of effusive enthusiasm and is rapidly approaching the level of promobabble.  Good Christians, who are familiar with the Biblical concept of parables, may wish to assess it as a subtle example of Bush-bashing, before they rush out to see this new cultural phenomenon, which is being touted as a “sure thing” for getting actor Jeff Bridges yet another Oscar nomination.

“Crazy Heart” tells the story of a drunk from Texas who makes a mess of everything he touches. 

Where have the only two Presidents to lose a war resided? 

Do you have to have Roger Whatzizname explain the symbolism of this film or are most red-blooded patriotic Americans smart enough to spot Bush-bashing when intellectual liberals start to shove it down their throats.

So here we have some clever Hollywood types “entertaining” us with the saga of a Texan who’s Midas touch turns everything into an untouchable mess.  (Ya better not step in it, cause it must be mud!, eh?)  Gees, who could that be?

Liberal “intellectuals” are going to repeat over and over the talking point about Jeff Bridges’ effort is a leading contender for this year’s “Best Actor Oscar®” and thus lure fans of country music into the non-stop example of stealth Bush-bashing. 

In the film, Tommy Sweet (Colin Farrell) sends some sweet (if it looks like symbolism, tastes like symbolism, then it must be symbolism!) deals to Bad Blake (Jeff Bridges) his former musical mentor.  Do you think they should have filmed that segment at Enron Headquarters to underscore the point they were attempting to make?

Texas means good bidness, right?  You don’t believe it, just ask Jet Rink, J. R. (did those initials stand for Jet Rink?) Ewing. Mebby you could ask the Lone (Texas) Ranger where he had his silver mine. 

Didn’t O. Henry, the famous writer, start a magazine in Texas and call it Rolling Stone?  (Not to be confused with a later effort with the same name started in San Francisco in the Sixties?)

Do the liberal media do much to tell you about macho Texans?  What about those boys with the Chaparral racing cars?  Are Cobra cars macho?  Well, wasn’t Carroll Shelby from Texas? 

How long is it going to take before the “Texas Roadhouse” people figure out that their restaurants would go over big in “the W. A. (that means Western Australia, mate)”?

When will some wild-eyed uber-enthusiastic liberal blogger report that he has seen Kenneth Lee Lay alive and well and having a burger with Elvis at a fast food joint in Kalamazoo?  Would a President ever use “witness protection program” forged material to help a friend avoid jail time?  Only liberals could suspect something that vile of a Republican President.

What famous person from Texas history resigned as governor at two different times in two different states?  They don’t tell you about that when they’s criticizing Sarah for resigning as Governor of Alaska, now do they? Sarah ain’t no Sam Houston, and that’s a fact.  (Bless her heart!) 

Speaking of the governor of Texas, will Kinky Friedman ever write another mystery novel?

Waylon allas and allas said that Texans think that when they die, they’re gonna go to Willie’s House.

Did the students at Berkeley sing songs asking “Tricky Dick” how many kids did he kill today?  Liberals always choose to pick on Texans. 

OK maybe nobody in Beverly Hills is hill-billy enough to have their Rolls Royce sedan converted into a pickup truck (with a rifle rack for the back window) so that makes them better, right?

To hear the liberal media tell it, the perfect country song will include a verse about mama, pickup trucks, drinking, getting out of prison, rain and trains.  Well, if that’s accurate then how did two Texans get to be President?

Allegedly, Jean-Paul Sartre, while he was in a German POW camp, wrote and produced a play about fascism, with the tacit approval of his Nazi captors.  Gosh, didn’t they feel dumb after he pulled off that stunt?

When the dust clears and Bad Blake has finished screwing things up, he responds with a smile and a shrug.  Can you honestly say liberals will see that and not think of Dubya?

Those liberals just love them some Bush-bashing parables.  They are going to give that Best Actor award to Jeff Bridges.  You just mark my word and wait and see, sho’nuf it’s gonna happen.

When astronauts have a problem do they call for the wisdom of a New York cabbie (“are you talkin’ to me?”) or do they go right to some good ole boys in Texas?

Is it only Texans who say:  “Houston, we have a problem.”?

Now, the disk jockey is going to play Bob Wills’ classic “Waltz across Texas,” Bobby Fuller’s “I Fought the Law (and the Law Won),” and Waylon and Willie’s version of “Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be cowboys.”  It’s time for us to dance on outta here.  Have a “lookout, Roger, I’m back in the movie review business” type week.